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Below are the 20 most recent journal entries recorded in ccalvinmoore's LiveJournal:

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Wednesday, August 30th, 2006
12:51 pm
suicide note, part 2(pantera)
Out of my mind, gun up to the mouth
No pretension, execution, live and learn
Rape and turn
Fret not family, nor pre-judged army
This is for me, and me only, cowards only
Try it

Don't you try to die, like me
It's livid and it's lies and makes graves

It's not worth the time to try, to replenish a rotting life
I'll end the problem, facing nothing, fuck you off, fuck you all
Tortured history, addict of misery, this exposes me
For weakness is a magnet - watch me do it


Graves descending down
Why would you help anyone who doesn't want it,
Doesn't need it, doesn't want your shit advice
When a mind's made up to go ahead and die?
What's done is done and gone, so why cry?

Friday, August 25th, 2006
5:15 pm
to whomever it may concern

im not movin back to tampa
im stayin in butterland
the doc says i have to ajust to my meds b4 i go back
90 days of meds is gonna be gay
they think add is wha tis triggering my depression
peace nigga!
Saturday, August 12th, 2006
1:02 pm
just hopless
ive come to the unfortunate conclusion that nearly everyone is fake. i can only name 7 people that arent. i cant even put my friends on the list(well a couple are.) still there is hope. i havent found it but its there. also, our school is overcrowded. i didnt want to be there anyways. i have 7th lunch if any1 wants to hang out with me there. as far as the opposite sex goes, not all members of the opposite sex are ugly. some have a rare beauty in them. that has nothing to do with looks of course. for the first time in a long time, i have no women on my mind(well...aside from that one girl whom i cant have a relationship with...dammit...)ive been forced to quit pot 110%(its boring to do alone.)ive joined the jazz band. its kinda cool cuz i just play bass with friends all day. im gonna be in a band with cory,manny, and jeff as soon as jeff comes back. only complaint i can offer on that is the name of the band.

sleepy hollow
1.the first thing that comes to mind is a child tale...
2-3.it has powermetal written allover it(and what do you know?) actually our 1st ep is supposed to have a concept to it...i always thought that stuff comes later...it shouldnt be a 1st impression. i dont want to be know as that one band who sings about a headless horsemen.
4.being as the band would be both thrash and powermetal(assuming id be allowed to write thrash)wouldnt it be great to have a name that stays true to both styles?
5.everyone knows sleepy hollow as being an old band(manny,jeff,cory,john gold, kevin engle)that quickly failed(due to jeffs departure.) if there was another band name, we would have a new rep to build upon.
6.could u really take that band name seriously?
7.if i were to start a band(as opposed to joining an existing one) shouldnt i have say on our name?

i havent said anything to cory and cant begin to talk to jeff about the whole thing. if i dont like the way the band is going, ill just wait till i have the oppurtunity to play with robert lang. hes a good musician,free of ego, who likes the same music as me. it was just flat out fun working with him. plus he can sing and knows theory. that helps. i miss that old bastard. hope hes doin good at ucf.

not that i would jam with them, i just would save my originals.

i like all my classes this year. i have the same math bok as i did since 9th grade. haha. maybe ill get it write this time. somehow i have the most basic math class and the most advanced english class.
i dont care what you say. MR MAYNARD IS THE SHIT!!! i like that class. i have american history with luft sittin next to me. man is he ignorant. hes a great guy to hang with though, as long as your not an iraqi. i have creative writing. its gonna be great. i have enough poetry to make it through the class just chillin. maybe ill get started on that novel i never began(actually, i have ideas for 2...an outline for one.)environmental science will be cool cuz im next to andy burgess. lunchtime, im stuck with jimmy cardella and van tucker. half the time they are mia. so then im just sitting there, bored for an hour. id really like to hang out with juliet martinez....shes the coolest. and possibly the only 1 to read this all the way through.
Sunday, August 6th, 2006
6:19 pm
myspace is dead...
some odd individual hacked into my myspace...im not sure who it is...but add me back if u can....


Saturday, July 8th, 2006
12:49 am
god is dead...
ive decided to permenantely give up christianity...there is no evidence for me to say that jesus is more real than allah or budda,ect. also, there is too much empasis on negative things. most of which are really up to questioning. many churches of modern day tech the following.

1.fear of man(eg, satan is everywhere)
2.fear of entertainment(satan is everywhere)
3.fear of damnation(satan lives there..and many question its existence)
4.some teach the earth as being 5k years old(thats just funny)
that dinosaurs arent real(thats also funny)
5.they used to say the moon was made of pearl(or something along those lines)
6.much about jesus is fictional and made up hundreds, even a thousand years later, and the hundreds of copies of "gospel," writings are different from each other
7.mary m. wasnt married to jesus..she wasnt mentioned until 1000 ad...
8.fear of sex
9. a life of poverty(it is as easy for a rich person to get into heaven as it is for a camel through a threadhole-jesus h. christ)
10.fear of love in general(avaid temtaion)
11.where does that 1/3 of you money the church demands? is it goin towards christian actions or trying to get converts? or towards cars and other material possesions?
12.it is a fact that the church is responsible directly for death(holy wars, givin hitler consent to kill all non-catholics,midevil
villification of females,ect)
13.god messed with job(prounounced jobe)too harshly.
14.most christians are cruel and unhappy. they dont tolerate those different. they find "satan," everywhere.
15.no gays? sounds neo-nazi to me...or plain nazi...
16.god has been used to help justify war for too long...
17.if god is all powerful(remember, im skeptical of his existence)
why have a war in heaven? couldnt he have bitch-slapped satan and put him in timeout?
18.if he is real and all powerful...why is there so much negativity these days? what is he waiting for? when will he save us? never...man will kill man...the end
19.god says that he is a jelous god..why cant we have joulousy?
20.dont think bad thoughts..oops...too late...
21. what is the point in self denial? sins make us happy! sin on every1(dont go lionhearted on us)
22.jesus didnt even start to fill out all the prophecy needed to have him qualify as gods child....
23.much was consited as sin for worldly means...dont eat pork(i kno its old testament..but same god)thats due to it being an unclean meat(or it was)and eat fish on friday?
24.NO christian holidays actually happened on thier celebrated date. they were put on the same days as other "oagan" holidays to outshine them and decrease thier popularity.
25.prositution was denouced simply because christianity wanted to make itself distinct from pagan religoins(pagans had sex cuz it was fun and sold sex at temples.)
26.where is this promised land? what a waste of 40 years in the desert...
27.it is belived that christianity was actually just a cult desined to take down the roman empire..hence why nero ceasar killed so many of them...
28.it was once belived that getting drunk brought you closer to god(thats why its called "spirits,")but now that people see it as being a bad thing, drunkeness is a sin. a reflection of society or religion? you tell me?
29.fasting? thats rediculous!!!its unhealthy!
30. countless contridictions have been seen in the bible...no need to list them...
31.christianity is very gimmick friendly nowadays. many just go to hang with friends! christian rock music? it doesnt rock...dont call it by such a name!!!
32.blind faith? they might as well as us to be stupid and uneducated!!!
33...tired..must sleep..ill give your god a break for now....

in ways it is also positive..much of the moral teachings are positive and god "saves," many from drug addication. few actually use the teaching "god is love." its a hate fest every sinday mourning...

Current Mood: devious
Wednesday, July 5th, 2006
10:54 pm
note to mr. engle
this is a note to mr. engle(father to cory engle.) he prob. reads my lj because im a friend of corys...
1.as far as the report i did for journalism...half of it was just crap
2.the comment you made about "you should start being a friend of corys and stop getting him into trouble." or whatever...i tell cory not to do stuff drug related that is hazardous to his health...like the pill incident among other things...
3.you attitude as me trying to make you out to be crappy parents was completely fictionalized and all in your head. on uncountable situations ive talked highly of your wife as she is a nice person and a caring mother. often times you son will complain about you and i always tell him that at least he has a parent who cares about him. when he gets grounded and complains i tell him that it is always a just treatment and that your punishments are fair...

if you would have given me a chance to say this when i was at your house then this wouldnt have been needed. i know that you read your sons lj posts and his friends. youll probably be angry at this. it could be worse..your views on me could have been true...if you feel the need to discuss this post call me at 835-8184...if you wish for me to delete it then that is fine as well...

Current Mood: curious
Sunday, July 2nd, 2006
8:44 pm
alot of people argue on what the essentials of metal are...if some sad person from another plant came forth and asked "what is metal?" what 10 records would you give him?

vol.4(black sabbath)
lights, camera, revolution(suicidal tendencies)
ghost reveries...or my arms your hurse(opeth)
diary of a madman(ozzy with rhoads)
walls of jericho(helloween)
cowboys from hell(pantera)
enemies of reality(nevermore)
rust in peace(megadeth)
iron maiden(iron maiden)
fabulous disaster(exodus)

that is what id give the spector...
Friday, June 30th, 2006
11:42 pm
ive decided to not get into a relationship for a long time. i have come to the conclusion that music is more improtant. the riffs i write will still be with me in 5 years. also music doesnt cheat on you and you dont have to call it or take it out for dinner(among a 10000 other hassles.) ill probably not stick to this plan, but imma try. from now on, chicks will be lower on my list...

my list.

1. music
2.education in school, politics/goverment/history and philosophy.
3.friends(they also turn on you. it is only human nature to choose ones self instead of another. i have realized that and will not put faith in those who do not deserve it.few do....)
4.job(aka taco bell)
5.writings(personal,poetry and my sad attempts at novels/novel outlines.)
6.charity work. helping the starving africans and such.
7. the opposite sex....or perhaps just having sex with them...if some1 worth mention comes around this will change...

notice that drugs/alchohol arent listed...
Tuesday, June 27th, 2006
10:17 pm
a good farwell...
alot of important things have happened lately...i shall list them...
1.got hired at taco bell...
2.discovered death(the band)
3.a relative is opening up for anthrax...
4.i bought karl marx's "the communist manifesto."...read it all the first day...
5.ive decided to move away from my dads house to my moms. i will be living next door to some1 who could help me with my math,i can get a job,be forced to mellow out from the more party happy calvin,meet better musicians hopefully,be busy enjoying freedom and not being grounded,will actually get to have a band(about time...)and start a satanic cult. i shall also make lsd in my house....let me know if you actually read this...comment you nazi scum...
Friday, June 23rd, 2006
6:56 pm
Rebel meets Rebel
this is the music video for dime and vinnies(and even ex-pantera's rex brown) music video for nuthin to lose. the project was a collaboration with country/blues artist David Allen Coe. it was the last studio recording Dime has done before he was murdered. enjoy!

Wednesday, June 21st, 2006
10:15 pm
who wants to jam? call 8358184

Saturday, June 10th, 2006
5:42 pm
the coolest thing ever
i have a new favorite nirvana song. its called negative creep. these ppl put a video for it on youtube with skateboarding in the backgroud. its the shit. you must see it or go to hell....


its almost thrash metal. imagine kill em all meets nevermind or bleach...
Friday, June 9th, 2006
7:52 pm
all sorts of random metal bands are releasing cds this months....i mostly anticipate the new shadows fall release...

check out the stone sour music video(youtube) 30/30 150...its good stuff
also check this out...http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pXP3h-I2ji0...its a skit of whinnei the pooh worshipping satan and it is hilarious!

heil satan! lol

Current Mood: munchies...
Tuesday, May 9th, 2006
10:28 pm
school junk again
Calvin Moore
News article 1

Beware of Benadryl?

Is the drug scene too large? It seems the answer to the question is obvious. As one student and recreational drug user, sophomore Andrew Sellers claims “Land O’ Lakes puts the “high” back in high school. The problem isn’t marijuana use. It’s drugs such as cocaine and over the counter items. One student nearly died from an overdose last Friday.
Of course, little has been done by the staff and the students at our school are being more open about drug use.
While stories of students being charged with possession of illegal narcotics is common, most people aren’t even taking into account the number of teens abusing over the counter drugs. They are often more economical than pot or cigarettes even. For just a couple of days worth of lunch money, students can purchase enough Corcidin to maintain a high for the entire seven period day. Most students assume that the drugs they are using are safe, considering they don’t even require a prescription. Reports of students taking as much as 20 Corcidin tablets are becoming common(other nicknames for the drug include Triple Cs and skittles).
Students are also enticed by the potency of the legal narcotics. It is not usual to experience hallucinations from a drug such as marijuana. If you take enough pills(usually $12 worth of less) you are pretty much guaranteed a hallucination. Few care for the risks of an overdose and look into the optimism of typical drug users. One user who nearly overdosed and went to the emergency room described the experience of the over the counter drug Dramamine.
“I thought I was at a party with friends and that I was at four different places at once.” The sophomore also reported seeing a tree sprout from his face and trying to pick up a can of beer from the ground. Of course, it wasn’t real and his hand went through it like a warplane through fog. He also was disappointed to find out the twenty dollars he thought he found was a hallucination as well.
Another issue involving over the counter narcotics is the fact that many students have no problems drinking a mixture of rum and Coke to go with it. Not only do the teens ignore the fact they are taking three to ten times the suggested dosage, but they do not heed the warning on the label clearly warning the user to not consume alcohol with the supplement.
For the most part, parents aren’t doing too much about it either. They see it as being less evil than alcoholic beverages and drugs such as crack, heroin and pot. They are just as ignorant to the dangers as their sons and daughters. Cory Engle’s parents (one of whom is a police officer, the other a daycare worker) didn’t send their son to rehab or enlist their child to an awareness program. He was actually hoping to spend the hallucinated $20 on more drugs. One would hope a member of the Pasco Police force would have a more extreme reaction to this. The same would go for a person who cares for our children.
Still however, the staff at our school and members of our school board have no better tactics than to say “Hugs not drugs.” Hopefully a student will start a club next year dedicated to drug awareness. Although most people shouldn’t get their hopes up.
7:00 pm
drugs are bad..mkay
what do you all think about me not smoking pot ever again...

and by never i mean only at partys....

also this is another random lj post where i would like to recieve constructive critisism from whoever has an opinion. feel free to post as anonymous. i wont give any1 a hard time about what they say...

Current Mood: determined
Tuesday, April 25th, 2006
5:49 pm
i have decided that speed has nothing to do with musicallity and being a good musician. pink floyd is proof of this. so is stevie ray vaughn and bb king...i could care less about bands that have soloing as thier only positive feature. music is deeper than the phrygian mode in Eminor at 400 beats per minute. i would rather listen to johnny cash than yngwie malmsteem because his music actually means something...yngwie is great in his own way but he cant write a song like john lennon can. the song imagine is better than anything he could dream of accomplishing

to people who think that being a good musician means mastering the art of shred...music is much deeper than just that...
Saturday, April 22nd, 2006
9:04 pm
hold on broken dreams for a moment
then watch them fade away

let loose your plans
see them all decay

and dont spend time chasing angels
just to watch them fly away...

Current Mood: lost
12:19 am
ive no eyes to see
what ive been

i have no ears to hear
the angels voice

i have no brain to
question what ive known

i have no scent to
breath you in

no heart for you to take...

but i have seen the girl in red
i hear what she said
to dream asleep and die alone
all this, i have known

taken by surprise
taken by a storm

fall from past grace
rise from the ground

ive got hope
all around

a very odd poem if i ever wrote one...
Sunday, April 16th, 2006
6:20 pm
false hope
what you say to me
you say to everyone else
so before i say hello
i say goodbye
to what could never have been...

Current Mood: cold
Wednesday, March 29th, 2006
9:37 pm
Calvin Moore
Nazi report

The Nazi Uprising

Just in this past week murders have occurred. The people responsible were Nazi teenagers. Officers were surprised to see how openly they expressed their Nazi influence. While most people do not support Hitler or his anti semetic message, the number of people joining the Nazi party is rising. America is becoming more and more tolerant, but where do we draw the line on what is and isn’t acceptable? Why should we tolerate those who do not tolerate others?
With the technology today, it is easy to be an active Nazi. Sites such as Myspace and Xanga make it to were you can join groups and talk with fellow people. The promoters of Nazi culture are using this to their advantage. There are several groups available for public citizens to join. You can find yourself at a Nazi meeting in no time. Some have even made Hitler’s political views “Mein Kampf,” more affordable to those who are members and wish to own a copy of the book.
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